Experiencing Mind-Body Flow
It is possible to move into a state where energy can shift and move through our system with more ease. In this state, we are less entrenched in our habitual patterns, and our minds and bodies become more fluid and free. What follows are examples of this state of mind-body flow from my experience.
I worked for almost a decade to move through chronic pelvic pain and repressed trauma. Over the years, my thoughts gradually moved out of constricting patterns, and at the same time my body became less stiff and inflexible. As my body and mind calmed down, I appreciated how stressed and vigilant I had been. I also became aware of childhood sexual abuse that had been suppressed for almost fifty years, and I worked to release the effects of this trauma physically, mentally, emotionally, and energetically. After this healing journey, my full system seemed more malleable. I could appreciate the connection between my body-mind-spirit, and changes seemed to happen faster and with more ease. Here are a few examples:
In my tenth healing year, I stepped into a new physical therapy job, and both of my wrists immediately became very achy and painful. They had been bothering me this way on and off for several years, but now I could hardly hold a glass of water. I worried that I wouldn't be able to do all the manual skills the job required.
This fear of not being able to handle the physical demands of the job had been present throughout my career. It began at age twenty-five when chronic neck pain made it impossible to work full-time at the physical therapy job I absolutely loved, and for fifteen years this chronic neck pain had limited my ability to work and to play. But now I had healed through this neck pain and the pelvic pain, too. I felt connected to my body and I had confidence in my ability to change. I considered my wrist pain and thought, I’m not going to let this stop me. I’m going to try this job, and if it’s not the way forward, I’ll know. Instead of replaying my old fear and anxiety, I can step forward in a new way. Over the next week, the discomfort subsided, and rarely returned.
About four months into the job, I woke up in the middle of the night with intense muscle spasms in my neck, and it was difficult to move. I stared at the ceiling in pain and worried I would not be able to work with patients the next day. Once again, I thought, I’ve grown a lot since those painful years, and I can help myself heal. I opened up and let my body move spontaneously (unwinding) and I could feel energy moving through. My body went into positions that I would never have advocated as a physical therapist! But I had faith and let it happen. My neck moved into specific postures and some of them were quite painful before they released. The next day, I was still sore but I went to work anyway, and the whole time I was working with patients I was pain free. That happened throughout the week, and in about four days the pain and stiffness resolved, and it hasn't returned.
Then about seven months later, I woke up in the middle of the night with my pelvic floor muscles in a major spasm; it felt like a charley horse in my rear end. I stayed calm even though the symptoms mimicked the pelvic pain I had spent almost a decade healing from. I worried for a minute or two that I wouldn’t be able to work the next day, but then decided it was okay if I had to take care of myself. I called out for spiritual support, and stated that I would do any healing necessary to move through the discomfort. I breathed deeply, and the pain lessened enough so I could go back to sleep. When I woke up the next morning, the pain was gone, and it didn't return.
In all these experiences, the painful patterns in my mind and body no longer had a hold on me, and it became possible to connect with energy/love/light even when I was hurting. I learned that pain can dissipate when fear and focus do not give it life. As we heal, we can resonate with the higher-frequency vibration information inherent in each situation, and when we do this our bodies stay calm even when we are experiencing the inevitable pain and challenge of our human lives.